Teach the Children

When you bring your child or other children to the theatre, prepare them beforehand by telling them about theatre manners. Children love learning new things!

Explain that they should be quiet, sit still, and not disturb others around them. If it is a serious play, tell them to listen carefully and not laugh at the sad parts or other inappropriate times. 

Say they need to keep any negative comments to themselves, until they get in the car or home. Performers have worked hard to prepare the event, and it will hurt their feelings. 

Have them use the restroom before the performance begins.   If you need access to a changing table, ask an usher where to find one.  Also check into getting a booster seat for children unable to see over the top of the people in front of them.

If your child (or one you are chaperoning) disturbs the audience, take them to the lobby.  You may be able to watch the performance on a television screen or listen to it on speakers in the lobby.  A few theatres have 'crying rooms' available. 

Don’t forget to bring plenty of chaperones for groups of children. Children should never be left unattended. Theatre staff have many responsibilities and should never be expected to keep an eye on children.  But if a child does become separated from you or your group, promptly ask a staff member for help finding the lost child.

Some theatres prefer children under 4 or 6 years of age to not attend, unless it is a youth symphony or other children’s performance. Most theatres require children to have their own seat and ticket. If a child is young and small enough to stay in your lap though the entire show, ask about the availability of a lap seat discount.

The content of some shows may not be appropriate for your child. When you buy your tickets, ask about any guidelines for child attendance.  Also see if you can find a synopsis or other item that will help you inform a child about the story, music, or other performance they will attend.  

Children can be scared just by being in a theatre, so the more preparation you give them the less likely they will have a bad experience.

Show Your Appreciation

Most performers appreciate enthusiastic applause at appropriate breaks in the performance, but not whistling or shouting, unless it is "Brava" or "Bravo." When a conductor is present, watch for him to drop his hands to his side as a sign for an appropriate spot, typically at the end of a musical work and not between movements or sections of a single piece. There are exceptions to this rule, like when the big Broadway show stopper has just been completed.

Do laugh in the appropriate places. Remember to always respond respectfully and appropriately. When watching a live performance, the performers will be affected by your reactions.

At the end of the performance, just before or during curtain call, don't rush for the exits. It's very rude to the performers and audience. Even when the parking lot gets busy and public transportation is tricky, leaving while the show is in progress is discourteous to everyone.

Remember to take all of your personal belongings and trash out with you. Return any booster seats, cushions, assistive devices, lap blankets, and other items borrowed or rented from the house to the appropriate place, typically the cloak room or an usher. If in doubt, ask any usher or house manager for assistance.

Sitting Your Seat Well

During the performance, keep feet on the floor, not on the seat or rail in front of you. Sit still in your seat. Don’t switch seats. Ramming elbows into your neighbor or kicking the seat in front of you is highly annoying. Leaning forward also blocks the view of other guests in many theatres. Special note to love birds: When you lean your heads together, you block the view of the people behind you.

Never place any items on the stage, they will distract the audience and could be dangerous to the performers. Keep the aisles clear of all feet, bags, and people. The production may be using the aisles during the performance for entrances or exits. The fire code typically requires aisles to be unblocked.

If you have items too large to fit completely under your seat, you typically need to check them at the cloak room. However, if they are needed for your mobility, such as crutches or walkers, consult with an usher on the best place for them to be stored during the show. Often, ushers will take such items to a nearby location for storage and return them to you at intermission, after the show, or on-demand.

Are You Noisy?

Out of consideration to the performers and your neighbors, do not eat, drink, or chew gum during the performance. It's too noisy and distracting. Save the snacking for before the show, intermissions, or after the performance.

Many theatres do not allow refreshments anywhere except in lobby areas. Before you buy or bring food and drink, be sure you understand the rules for that theatre and performance. If you're already at the theatre, ask any usher if you need to know the rules.

Some theatres allow you to pre-order refreshments for intermission before the show. That can be a great way to avoid the long lines!

If required, quietly unwrap cough suppressants before the performance begins, at intermission, during applause, laughing, or loud musical numbers. If you know you will need them, unwrap a sufficient supply to last to the next break.

If you have an uncontrollable bout of coughing, take it to the lobby. You can often hear and watch the show on lobby monitors.

Don't Get Physical

As I was preparing this entry, a friend coincidentally posted this on Facebook:

"Enjoyed the Carmina Burana, but I can't stand people who go to musical performances and insist on pretending THEY'RE conducting the orchestra. Put your hands down, you poseur!"

Do not talk, whisper, sing, hum, or audibly beat time with any body part during the performance. Listening is important because you will be hearing performers doing their best to entertain you. It’s important that you listen very well so you don’t miss anything and you don’t disturb others around you.

Avoid rummaging in purses, backpacks, or shopping bags; thumbing through programs; or any other noise-making activities during the show. When the performance starts, for instance when the lights go down, the curtain rises or the overture is being played, it’s time to be quiet.

If someone is being loud or annoying, start by turning, facing them directly, and glaring. This is completely silent, and generally alerts most offenders that they're being offensive. The next step is a sharp "Shh!" or a sotto voce, "Please be quiet." Do not escalate any further than this yourself. Alert an usher or house manager and let them deal with the offender.

Enjoy Being Unplugged

You should turn off cell phones, pagers, watch alarms, radios, MP3 players, iPads, and other electronic devices. Vibrate settings are often very loud in a quiet theatre, so it is better if you turn your phone off. If you forgot to turn off your phone and it rings during the performance, immediately turn it off, do not answer the call.

Do not send or receive text messages, read your email, surf the Internet, use your cell phone as a flashlight to read the program, or use your electronic devices at all during the performance. One of these devices can light up a very large area in a dark theatre. You can always check for messages or use your devices during the intermission or after the show.

Do not use cameras, video/audio recorders, or other recording devices (including cell phones, PDAs, and IPods) during the performance. Besides being distracting to performers and other guests, it is usually against the law to record any professional performance, including the sets, props, and costumes, without obtaining explicit written permissions from the production company and others before the show. In many theatres, recording devices must be checked at the cloak room and are not allowed inside the house.

Sometimes, there are exceptions to these rules. I heard recently of a play that encouraged the audience to tweet about the show during the performance as part of the artistic concept. However, until you find out otherwise, you should assume that you will turn off all of your electronic devices inside the theatre.

Get What You Need

Theatre seats are usually staggered so that no one is directly in front of you. However, if your view is totally blocked by a tall person in front of you, get a booster cushion for your chair, or ask the usher to find you another seat before the performance begins.

Booster seats, cushions, assistive devices, lap blankets, binoculars, or other items may be available, sometimes for a rental fee, from the theatre. Check with the cloak room or an usher before the show if you need something. You might even check your coat, hat, backpack, or other large item so you don’t have to deal with them in your seat.

Also remember, if you wear big hats or hair, you could be blocking the view of the guests behind you.

Come Early, Get Ready, Enjoy Show.

At many performances, you will receive a printed program. Be sure to arrive early enough to read the program, so that you will have an idea of what to expect in the show. Also, you will find the names and information about people who are performing and helping to put on the show. Read the credits to learn more about the people and the performance. It will make the show more enjoyable and you’ll learn things that might surprise you.

Take care of personal needs (drinks of water or restroom breaks) before the show, because typically you won’t be able to leave your seat until the intermission or until the performance ends. When you do leave your seat, you become subject to the late-seating rules for that performance and may not be re-seated immediately.

Two Sources of Red Eyes

Most theatres either prohibit smoking (and other use of tobacco products) or restrict such activity to specific areas, often outside the building. Local ordinances or fire codes can also apply. If you have questions about these rules, ask any usher.

Theatres selling or otherwise providing alcoholic beverages are subject to related laws and regulations. Minimum drinking age or hours of sale limits, along with restrictions on where alcohol can be within or outside the facility are examples of typical limitations. In many areas, theatres are required to quit selling alcohol to individuals who appear inebriated. Another consideration is the lack of balance caused by alcohol. Most theatres have steps, stairs, ramps, or other uneven surfaces that can be difficult to navigate. These conditions can cause a serious fall or other injuries for the unsteady of foot. If you've been drinking and are ready to leave, please do not drive. Most theatres are prepared to call you a cab if you don't already have a designated driver. If you have questions about the use of alcohol in a theatre or need assistance with transportation, ask a server or usher for assistance.

Take your seat, please!

An usher will usually greet you and ask for your ticket. With a general admission ticket, you typically get to pick your own seat. If your ticket has a row and seat number, the usher will check the number and direct you to your assigned seating. Be sure to sit in the seat you purchased or were given so that you don’t cause confusion for other audience members.

In larger and some smaller theatres, the layout of seating can be confusing. These houses could have multiple levels with confusing names like orchestra, parterre, mezzanine, loggia, or balcony. Seats could be arranged in sections called left, center, right, upper, or lower. Entry doors for these sections are sometimes numerous. If you don't know how to find your seat, look for the nearest usher and ask for assistance. They are usually trained to answer your request with quick but easy to follow directions. If these directions are unclear, ask for clarification. It is in everyone's best interests that you find your seats quickly.

Don't be the White Rabbit

If you dine out before attending the theatre, use the restroom at the restaurant as theatre restrooms often have long lines. And leave yourself lots of time to get to the theatre; park; walk-in; purchase, pickup, or present your tickets; check your coats; pickup programs; and find your seats.

To avoid being late, plan to arrive at least 30 minutes early. Sometimes heavy traffic, crowded parking lots, or other unexpected circumstances make it impossible to arrive on time. However, if you arrive late, you must wait patiently until there is a break in the act, performance, or symphony. Many theatres lock the auditorium doors when the performance begins or restarts after an intermission. Allow yourself plenty of time to get to or return to your seat.

Specific policies for late seating are typically set by the production company and followed by the house managers or ushers. Do not argue with the ushers about having to wait, they are just doing their job. Many theatres have a television screen in the lobby showing the performance while you wait. If the ushers seat you during the performance, it may not be in the seat you purchased, but in a convenient seating area that causes less distraction to other seated guests. Remain in those seats until the house lights come on at intermission, then most theatres allow you to take advantage of the break to find and use your purchased seat.

Fancy, Formal, Semi-formal, Business, Casual, or What?

Few theatres enforce dress codes these days, but if you have any doubts, contact the box office or theatre in advance to find out. If they have none, and depending on the type of performance or venue, you may want to make the night special by dressing up anyway. Opening night of a performance is often a dress-up night, and you may want to wear more formal clothes no matter when you attend. Try dressing up and you’ll feel different!
Remember to go easy with the atomizer: many people are highly allergic to perfume and cologne. Also, be aware that hats and large hairdos impede sightlines for audience members behind you.  If needed, you could be asked to move.
Consider taking a coat, sweater, or wrap - even in the summer. Air conditioning or other drafts can make the theatre experience a bit chilling in some houses. If you don't need it, most theatres allow you to check it at the cloak room.

Ticketing is Important

Purchasing a ticket is typically required for a theatre performance and it will be for a specific date and show. Be sure to check your ticket when you buy it, because tickets are not usually refundable or exchangeable.  If you lose your ticket, contact the theatre's box office immediately to determine your options.

Unless you will be purchasing your ticket at the show or picking it up at will call, don't forget to bring your ticket to the theatre.  If you have multiple tickets for a theatre, as is the case with many season ticket holders, be sure to bring the correct ticket for the correct date and time.  If you leave your ticket at home, some theatre box offices may be able to give you a reprint or pass if you can produce the receipt, credit card, or correct ID used to originally purchase the ticket.
Always remember to ask about any special accommodations you may need, such as wheelchair seating, avoiding steps, or assistive devices. If you forget, try to contact the theatre at least two-weeks in advance of the performance to make arrangements. Though every theatre expects these requests, they can be difficult to satisfy when you ask at the last minute.
Remember that a ticket is typically revocable without any refund if you cause a serious disturbance or otherwise violate the law or policies of the theatre.  Under these circumstances, you may be asked to view the show from the lobby or even ejected from the premises.
If you don't like a performance, some theatres may give you a partial refund or discount on another performance if you walk out early in the show.  But don't expect this type of response; its not a common occurrence.
If you buy your tickets online, be sure to print the receipt or online tickets when given the opportunity to do so.  Be certain these documents print out clearly.  If they contain bar-codes, be sure they print at the original size.  Bar-codes typically must be printed in dark black on white if the theatre uses automated ticket scanners.  Folding a document across the middle of a bar code can also prevent it from scanning.  If your documents cannot be printed correctly at home, consider using will-call pickup or calling the box office in advance of the show to explore other options.

Why Theatre Etiquette?

"At a matinee of the musical version of "Sunset Boulevard," for which I had scored a last-minute ticket, cameras flashed when Glenn Close made her first-act entrance as Norma Desmond. The flashes continued through her solo.

Striding downstage and signaling the orchestra in true diva fashion, Close delivered her ultimatum: 'Ladies and gentlemen, we can either have a photo session or we can go on with the show, but we cannot do both.'

Wild applause erupted and the show went on, though laughter and more applause greeted the star's first line of dialogue after the interruption. "Now go!" she commanded the intruder into her mansion."

The above was copied from an article originally found at Centre Daily. I also heard about this incident and some similar performance interruptions by other actors in other articles. While I'm not certain I completely agree with Ms. Close's action, I very much understand the frustration she, and probably much of her audience, were feeling.

Everyone who attends a theatre performance should thoroughly enjoy that experience. The performers and all of the people behind the scenes have worked very hard to create an entertainment event. Audience members should show everyone the respect they deserve. Then they will enjoy the event more, too. In my next posts, I will introduce twenty etiquette tips that will enhance the theatre experience for everyone. I hope that my readers will comment freely, but respectfully.